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The Trial of Hercules Part 1/Transcript
A transcript of the comic "The Trial of Hercules Part 1": Cover : Topps Comics : 1''' : $2.95 US : $4.15 Canada : FIRST : Collectors : Item Issue : Roy : THOMAS : Jeff : BUTLER : Steve : MONTANO : Michael : GOLDEN : '''Hercules: The Legendary Journeys Inside Cover : Hercules: The Legendary Journeys : Based on the Television Series : Created by Christian Williams, : And endorsed by : Gods and Goddesses Everywhere : The Trial of Hercules : Part 1 : Roy Thomas : Writer : Jeff Butler : Penciler : Steve Montano : Inker : Ken Lopez : Letterer : Michael Golden : Cover Artist : Digital Chameleon : Color Rendering : Renée Witterstaetter : Colorist/Editor ---- : Topps Comics :Ira Friedman – Publisher :Len Brown – Creative Director :Charles S. Novinskie – Sales and Promotions Manager :Tommi Stroul – Newsstand Sales Manager :Brian C. Boerner – Graphic Design & Production :India Smalls – Publishing Assistant :Jim Salicrup – Associate Publisher/Editor in Chief :Dwight Jon Zimmerman – Executive Editor :Renée Witterstaetter – Editor :Gary Gerani – West Coast Editor :Carl Gafford – Editorial Prod. Manager :Jonathan Baylis – Associate Editor ---- :Arthur T. Shorin – Chairman of the Board :John J. Langdon – President : Special Thanks to Nancy Cushing Jones and Connie Rush For advertising information contact Bob Rosen at KQ&R 850 Seventh Ave. Suite 903, New York, NY 10019, PH: (212) 399-9500, FAX: (212) 265-0986 : For back issues: Write to Tom Morey at Space Travelers, P.O. Box 1446, Harrisonburg, VA 23455-2523, PH: (540) 432-6771 : HERCULES: THE LEGENDARY JOURNEYS™ Volume I, Number I, June 1996. Published monthly by TOPPS COMICS, INC., One Whitehall St, New York, NY 10004. : Copyright ©1996 MCA Television, Ltd. All rights reserved. Licensed by MCA/Universal Merchandising, Inc. All other material Copyright ©1996 The Topps Company, Inc. : All Rights Reserved. The stories, characters, and incidents mentioned in this magazine are entirely fictional. HERCULES: THE LEGENDARY JOURNEYS™ (including all : prominent characters featured in this issue and the distinctive likenesses thereof) are trademarks of MCA Television, Ltd. & MCA/Universal Merchandising, Inc. : Topps Comics, Inc. is a wholly-owned subsidiary of The Topps Company, Inc. First Printing. Printed in Canada. Issue Page 1 Salmoneus: "The fierce Lernean Hydra-- Hippolyte, wild-eyed Queen of the Amazons-- The man-eating Nemean Lion-- These were but three of the famous Twelve Labors of the mighty Hercules!" Page 2 Salmoneus: "Yes, my friends, you can hear the grisly details of those exploits and nine more-- courtesy of Salmoneus, official biographer of the son of Zeus! Er-- all for a modest donation, of course. So-- who'll be first to cross my palm with silver? Believe me, you've no idea how inspiring a crossed palm can be to a humble storyteller! You, uh, have a question, young lady?" Pronoea: "Yes, you said Hercules is the son of Zeus, but isn't that really just a myth?" Salmoneus: "What isn't these days? No, but seriously folks-- speaking as his best friend, I can personally assure you that Hercules didn't just fall off a turnip wagon! Zeus became enamored of the beauteous Alcmene, while her husband was away on business-- so Zeus took his likeness-- and the rest, as they say is history. Alas, the King of the Gods already had a wife-- jealous Hera of the peacock eyes-- not exactly the forgiving type. Alcmene figured out the truth by the time her son was born. But she didn't enlighten her husband, Amphitryon. Why look for trouble?" Page 3 Salmoneus: "Not that she had to look-- 'cause Hera sent some Poison Serpents to attack baby Hercules in his crib. She's not a nice person. But Hercules had inherited more than his father's eyes-- and he tied them up in knots. If his mother had any lingering doubts about who she'd spent that cozy evening with, I guess that pretty much cleared them up. Hercules grew into a handsome young hero, who now wanders the Earth doing good-- and trying to undo any evil wrought by Hera or her lackey, Ares, the God of War. Not just Earth, either! He went all the way down into Hades to drag back the three-headed hound, Cerberus. Did I mention that's another of his twelve legendary labors? I'm weaving them all into an authorized biography-- but you've been privileged to hear a sneak preview of this work in progress. I trust you'll all be properly appreciative... Thank you, good people. Remember-- the second show will be completely different... They've gone! Now to see if these few coins they doled out are real. Ouch! This one is, at least! I think I just chipped a tooth!" Pronoea: "Sanctimonious...?" Page 4 Salmoneus: "Salmoneus! The name is Salmoneus, dear lady. Perhaps you heard of me when I was a traveling toga salesman -- or when I used to manage my brother-in-law's bar over in--" Pronoea: "No, but I've been searching for Hercules... only, everyone told me his best friend is named Iolaus." Salmoneus: "Iolaus? A fine youth, over Irica way. Hercules and I do let him tag along, on occasion. But if it's Hercules you're looking for, why, he checks in with me every few weeks-- just to give me new tidbits for his biography. I'm sure he'll be back this way any day now..." Pronoea: "I can't wait! You must take me to him-- at once!" Salmoneus: "What? Why, naturally, I'd love to-- nothing I'd like better-- but I'm stuck here, you understand. My public--" Pronoea: "--will forgive you for deserting your post, I'm sure, to help a lady in distress-- who will pay you generously for your services." Salmoneus: "It'll just take me a few minutes to hitch up the wagon... ...er, after you buy us a wagon, of course." Page 5 : Several days later... Pronoea: "I begin to doubt you truly know where Hercules is!" Salmoneus: "But I do, Pronoea-- at least in a general way. He's gotta keep on the move, you know. Always looking for places to do good-- and then he's got enemies, like Hera and Ares..." Pronoea: "Hera? Ares? No god could be a worse enemy than Zeus!" Salmoneus: "Hercules tells me he and his old man have always got along pretty well-- mostly from a distance." Pronoea: "Just the same, I want my money back, so I can hire someone else to find Hercules for me." Salmoneus: "What money? You haven't given me any yet." Equinius: "Nor will she-- because she's giving it to us, instead!" Pronoea: "What--?" Salmoneus: "Uh-oh." Equinius: "You're in Centaur Country now, and we charge a toll to any human crossing our lands." Pronoea: "A toll? How much?" Kayuus: "Everything you've got!" Salmoneus: "That sounds awfully--" Kayuus: "Awfully what?" Salmoneus: "Reasonable. I was going to say, it sounds awfully reasonable!" Pronoea: "Not to me! If you think I'm going to turn over my purse to a bunch of men with horses' rear ends--!" Salmoneus: "I--I wouldn't anger them, Pronoea! They m-might kill us if we refuse..." Equinius: "Well, actually, we're going to kill you anyway, little man-- then ravish the girl. All the rest was just making conversation." Page 6 Salmoneus: "Hold tight! We'll make a run for it!" Pronoea: "Ohhhh!" Salmoneus: "But, actually -- it's kind of difficult to make a run for it with oxen! We're-- Yipes!" Equinius: "Now, woman, where do you keep this money you were prattling about?" Pronoea: "Let me go, you refugee from an ill-kept stable! You even smell like a horse!" Equinius: "Owwtch! Feisty wench! Guess I'll just have to search you-- while Dromus tramples your boyfriend!" Dromus: "I could finish this fool with one hoof tied behind my back, Equinius." Salmoneus: "No!" Hercules: "You heard Salmoneus, centaur. Even though he didn't say it very loud-- --he said no!" Dromus: "Wha--?! Who dares--?" Page 7 Hercules: "I'm Hercules..." Page 8 Hercules: "...And I'd really appreciate it if you stopped trying to turn my friend into roadkill." Salmoneus: "Hear that, Pronoea? 'Friend'! I told you Hercules and I were--" Equinius: "Horse-drop! He doesn't look like any son of Zeus to me!" Pronoea: "Or even to me!" Salmoneus: "Go on, Hercules-- prove it to them!" Hercules: "You know I don't go around showing off, Salmoneus. I'm sure our four-legged friends realize they made a mistake- --and that they'll trot off now, and spare themselves a lot of grief." Equinius: "You think he's Hercules, Kayuus? He did pull Dromus backward by his tail..." Kayuus: "He sneaked up behind him and caught him off balance, that's all! I'll cleave his suntanned skull with my club!" Hercules: "How do you get yourself into these fixes, Salmoneus?" Salmoneus: "Could we talk about it some other time? Uh... you did know there's another one behind you, didn't you?" Page 9 Hercules: "Actually, I've always kind-of liked centaurs... but except for my old teacher Saridion and my pal Derek-- --they never seem to take to me. Nessus was the worst-- don't get me started about him! And his brother Nemmus wasn't much better!" Kayuus: "You're tying my legs together-- like I was a swine?!" Hercules: "If you act like an animal, don't complain about being treated like one. Unnnhh!" Dromus: "Hard-headed, huh? I'm Dromus. Nessus and Nemmus were my cousins. If You were Hercules, I'd be honor-bound to avenge them. But since you're an imposter, I'll kill you just for the Hades of it!" Hercules: "What does it take to convince you people?" Dromus: "No mere man-- can withstand the thundering charge-- of a centaur!" Page 10 Hercules: "Then what does it tell you-- when I not only stand up to you-- --but force you backward!?" Dromus: "Equinius! I-- I'm starting to believe he really is Hercules! I'm hoofing it-- and you better do the same!" Equinius: "Aye, but I'm taking the woman with me!" Pronoea: "No--!" Hercules: "You horse-men just don't take no for an answer, do you? Let her down-- slow and easy-- while you still got a scalp." Equinius: "A-all right...!" Hercules: "Are you hurt?" Pronoea: "No... but what about the one you hog-tied? Are you going to kill him?" Hercules: "What purpose would that serve? You gallop along and tell your cronies you should all find a new line of work. Next time I may not be in such a good mood." Page 11 Salmoneus: "That was fantastic! If you and I teamed up on the fight circuit--" Hercules: "Not interested. What are you doing here?" Pronoea: "I hired him-- because I had to find you!" Hercules: "You had a weird way of doing it. I wasn't due in this area for months." Salmoneus: "What can I say? He's here, isn't he?" Pronoea: "Hercules, I need help! My husband's being held captive and tortured in the Caucasian Mountains." Hercules: "When you put it that way... Are you coming, Salmoneus?" Salmoneus: "Er-- I wish I could-- but I've neglected my business too long already, so if Pronoea will just pay what she owes me..." Pronoea: "Well... you did find him... in a way." Hercules: "Speaking of business, old friend... I hear you're going around claiming you're my official biographer. And what's this 'Twelve Labors' nonsense?" Salmoneus: "It's what you call a hook. You've done so many great deeds, it gets confusing after a while. I figured if I made it a particular number-- say, an even dozen-- people'd want to collect them all, so to speak." Hercules: "And just which twelve things I've done are my 'labors'?" Salmoneus: "I haven't finalized the list yet-- but soon as I do, you'll be the first to know, I promise! Bye now! Don't be a stranger." Pronoea: "Aren't you angry at him for trading on your friendship?" Hercules: "Oh, that's just Salmoneus. Well, we better get going. It's quite a ways to the Caucasus." Page 12 : Day Three. Pronoea: "Push harder-- harder! We'll never get there if you don't put your back into it." : Day Five. Hercules: "You never said who's holding your husband... or why." Pronoea: "An evil lord-- because my beloved stole something from him." Hercules: "Your spouse is a thief?" Pronoea: "It's not like that-- but that's all I can say." : Day Eight. Hercules: "You know, you've never even told me your husband's name." Pronoea: "Please-- I can't tell you-- not yet." : Day Ten. Pronoea: "He's being held beyond that stretch of Road!" Hercules: "You mean the one somebody dumped half a mountain on?" Pronoea: "Yes." : Several grueling hours later... Hercules: "Well-- this should clear the way for-- the wagon!" Pronoea: "You bring it! He's right up ahead! I know he is!" Hercules: "This is crazy! There's no city-- not even a castle-- for miles! Who could be held prisoner out here in the middle of-- oh." Page 13 Hercules: "Prometheus! What did you do? Cross Hera again? But you're a Titan! Last time I saw you, you were fifty feet tall, and now-- Pronoea why isn't he saying anything?" Pronoea: "It's Zeus who had him chained here. He shrunk us both-- then he cast a spell over my beloved, so he can't speak. Well? Aren't you going to free him?" Hercules: "If you're his wife, you know I freed him twice before-- when Hera bound him. But-- going against my father--!? That's something I have to think about first." Pronoea: "Well, think fast!" Hercules: "Fast? Why? I-- oh. Right. I should've known Zeus would post a guard!" Pronoea: "Aieeeee!" Page 14 Hercules: "Don't worry! I won't let him get you!" Pronoea: "You stupid, half-human yokel! It wasn't us he was after-- it was my poor husband!" Hercules: "That metal vulture really tore him up, all right! Being a Titan, he can't die-- but he can hurt-- even if he can't scream. Look it's been a while since I had any contact with my father, but I swear I'll find out why--" Pronoea: "I know why! It's because Prometheus stole fire from Mt. Olympus and gave it to mankind." Hercules: "That was ages ago. Surely Zeus isn't still punishing him for that!" Pronoea: "No one can hold a grudge like Zeus! I'm in a position to know. He sends that huge metal monster every day to tear at his vitals, and-- Watch out!" Page 15 Pronoea: "It's coming back!" Hercules: "When you said your husband was being tortured up here, you really weren't kidding, were you?" Pronoea: "His immortal body heals itself overnight-- but next morning, the vulture returns to save him all day!" Hercules: "Not today!" Pronoea: "Hercules-- if he fails you, beloved-- what hope is there?" Hercules: "Whoa, bird! Even the Cretan Bull never bucked as hard as you do! You even shook off one of your own metal feathers!" Page 16 Hercules: "Well-- maybe I can put it to good use! So there's a brain in there, is there? Probably made of mercury... or molten iron. Either way, it won't do you much good anymore! But that means-- you won't do me any good, either! Look out below! I'll try to--" Page 17 Pronoea: "Are you all right?" Hercules: "Yeah, I landed on top of him. But I can't recommend a metal feather-bed." Pronoea: "Can you break these chains?" Hercules: "If Hephaestus made them-- not without the blacksmith god's sword." Pronoea: "They were forged by Cratos and Bia." Hercules: "Oh, well... in that case--! Hgnnhh!" Prometheus: "Thank you... Hercules..." Pronoea: "Beloved! You're free-- and you can speak!" Prometheus: "You were wrong about one thing, Dear Pronoea. Zeus ordered me bound... but another god came later and muted me." Hercules: "Why?" Prometheus: "I know a secret Zeus should hear... and that god didn't want me to trade it to Zeus for my freedom." Hercules: "Which God?" Prometheus: "I'm not sure, because he came in the form of a cloud. 'He'... or maybe 'she.' It's hard to tell with clouds." Hercules: "Sounds like one of Hera's stunts." Pronoea: "It was a woman with peacocks who advised me to find you, Hercules! Uh... why is it so dark all of a sudden?" Prometheus: "There's your answer, wife." Pronoea: "By Typhon!" Page 18 Prometheus: "Bia-- and Cratos! The Silent Ones!" Hercules: "No wonder they're silent! No mouths!" Prometheus: "That's because they serve Zeus-- and he doesn't like any backtalk." Hercules: "Tell me about it. My freeing you must've set off some kind of alarm in Olympus. Just a wild guess-- but offhand I'd say they plan to re-bind you with those even thicker chains." Pronoea: "But surely, Hercules and Prometheus, fighting side by side, can overcome two minor godlings!" Page 19 Hercules: "Well, we'll soon find ouuuuuuuph!" Pronoea'': "Husband! He was caught off guard, because he thought you were beside him! Why didn't you--" '''Prometheus: "I'm-- still weak from my wound! I can barely stand-- let alone brawl--" Pronoea: "Then-- Hercules must fight alone!" Hercules: "Don't worry. I'm used to it. Besides, these two aren't really gods, or even godlings. The way I heard it, they're just walking incarnations of a couple of physical traits. 'Cratos' here means 'might'-- and 'Bia' means-- uh--" Page 20 Hercules: "Oh, yeah-- now I remember! 'Violence'! You know, you two are starting to get on my nerves. Between Zeus and Hera, Prometheus has been chained up three times too many, for my money. Now, you just run back to Olympus and tell my father-- arrrhh! Okay... so maybe I'll carry both of you up Mount Olympus... ...and tell him myself." Page 21 Pronoea: "Hercules! Watch out for their-- --thunderbolts!" Hercules: "Th-that-- --was--" Pronoea: "He's falling!" Prometheus: "Nothing stands before the bolts of Zeus-- --not even his own son!" Pronoea: "Flee, beloved! Now Bia's coming for you!" Page 22 Prometheus: "Even if-- I could run-- I'd not leave you at the mercy of these filthy-- aarrrgg!" Pronoea: "Let him go! Hasn't he suffered enough at Zeus' bloody hands? You've even placed a metal clamp over his mouth... Now, at last, I understand! You serve not only Zeus-- but the vile God who wants my husband silenced! And-- where are you taking Hercules? Oh, Prometheus... beloved... I sought out the son of Zeus to free you. Then what hope is there for you-- for any of us-- --when Hercules himself has been carried off to meet his doom?? But still-- somehow-- Page 23 Pronoea: "--I wouldn't count Hercules out just yet!" : Next: Hercules on Trial! Next Issue : The Original Trial of the Century : The Trial of : Hercules : The Accused (Hercules) : The Judge (Zeus) : The Jury (Furies) : The Prosecutor (Ares) : The Dream Team (Salmoneus, Atalanta) : Complete Topps : Team Coverage : Next Month in : Issue #2 of : Hercules: The Legendary Journeys : Roy Thomas : – Reporter : Jeff Butler, Steve Montano : – Court Artists : Michael Golden : – Cover Artist on Location : high atop Mt. Olympus : By Zeus, miss it not! Other material : Mars Attacks novels advertisement : Behind The Men, The Myth feature with Jeff Butler and Roy Thomas : Official X-Files merchandise advertisement : The X-Files Collection advertisement : Mars Attacks Baseball Special #1 advertisement : Independence Day #0 advertisement : Mars Attacks comic back order form (inside back cover) Back Cover : This is the : story of a : time long ago... : a time of myth and : legend, when the : ancient Gods were : petty and cruel, : and they plagued '' : ''mankind with suffering, : Only one man dared to : challenge their power--'' : ''HERCULES! : Hercules possessed a strength : the world had never seen...a : strength surpassed only by the : power of his heart. : He journeyed the Earth, battling : the minions of his wicked : stepmother, Hera, the all-'' : ''powerful queen of the Gods. : But, wherever there was : evil...wherever an innocent : would suffer...there would be--'' : ''HERCULES! Category:HTLJ comic book transcripts